David Schnarch. · Rating details · 2, ratings · reviews. Passionate Marriage is recognized as the pioneering book on intimate human relationships. PASSIONATE MARRIAGE: Keeping Love & Intimacy Alive in Committed In Passionate Marriage, Dr. David Schnarch organizes fourteen chapters into three . Passionate Marriage: Sex, Love, and Intimacy in Emotionally Committed Relationships By David Schnarch, Ph. D. Norton, pp. ISBN

Author: Grogal Kagagrel
Country: Algeria
Language: English (Spanish)
Genre: Photos
Published (Last): 28 October 2005
Pages: 147
PDF File Size: 4.85 Mb
ePub File Size: 17.79 Mb
ISBN: 777-2-61840-424-3
Downloads: 52338
Price: Free* [*Free Regsitration Required]
Uploader: Samucage

That’s certainly what meditation is all about. You have got do something new, and that means, regardless of what it’s going to be, it’s passionage to be outside of both of your comfort zones, because we went through that initial process.

You cannot simply say this and have it be so, particularly when you are talking about explicit sexual content without mentioning how to apply it to a homosexual relationship. This book and Dr Schnarch’s description of differentiation had a profound positive affect on me, on the way I see myself, and on the way I see and approach my marriage.

Schnarch’s theory draws from the family therapist Murray Bowen, and is really schnzrch from much other relationship theory, which often holds that current relationships salve the wounds of past harms in a direct way – if you didn’t get enough attention and attachment as a child, the solution is more attention and attachment now, right?? And they’re saying, “explain to me in thirty words how I can tell my public how your approach is different?

And the first move in a collaborative alliance is always confronting yourself first. Schnaech “non-pathological” approach – not making something wrong just because it’s hard – was the beginning of what opened into the hugest, most joyful, reawakening, better than what I could have imagined, because the process we traveled, individually and jointly with the help of this approach pasionate so outside of my scope, and yet, so “Oh!

Actually having to go through that loss? This inspirational book is sure to help couples invigorate their relationships and reach the fullest potential in their love lives. Well, now you’ve made me settle down. You’re going to have to calm yourself down, not over react and not over anticipate your partner’s rejection and things like that.


I would be interested to hear his point of view on polyamory for couples who just cannot get turned on by each others sexual desires even after sexual confidence has been attained. That’s what human beings are driven to do because it’s wired into the evolution of the species, of our brain.

Well, when we’re talking about human beings, we’re not talking about your opinion or my opinion. Then flip through it. So that is why I started working with sex and relationships. Human beings like monogamy, but they also like sexual variety. If you want to know exactly what is missing in your relationship, Schnarch will tell you unapologetically.

So I started thinking, “OK, well, let’s have a baby. You have to have a set of values. When humans form relationships, there are rules. Well, because sex always occurs in the context of a relationship. As any married-this-long know, the relationship changes over time, and in an effort to learn whether our relationship changes are normal, I found this book. Dafid if you and I schnsrch poorly differentiated—meaning we have weak Four Points of Balance—we’re going to bog down like many, many couples do.

As for the writing, it gets better and better. The reality is that there are a lot of things in life that make us nervous, but the hallmark of an adult—and an also good marital partner—is that you don’t let your anxiety control you.

In the Beginning, GOD: That’s holding onto yourself. You do it by getting into a relationship and going through this incredible developmental process that is built into all emotionally committed relationships. I would recommend it to anyone who is interested in understanding long-term relationships.

Here’s my very helpful and provocative conversation with Dr. Schnarch calls it holding onto oneself while tolerating closeness with another. That’s one of the beauties of a differentiation-based approach. I understand how i can improve my relationships by growing myself.

And so there are integrity challenges built all throughout married and family life.

Passionate Marriage : Keeping Love and Intimacy Alive in Committed Relationships

So my parents had to do that too; they were challenged and they stayed together when their peers broke up. I mean he goes as far as to describe what people look like, which felt more like a novel. We also talked about the four drives of sexual desire; what David means by the word integrity and its importance in a healthy relationship; and what it might mean to hold onto yourself in a relationship. It was something that just knocked me out.


Passionate Marriage: Keeping Love and Intimacy Alive in Committed Relationships

Before that, there was no self. Mar 10, Alana Munro rated it it was amazing. Learning how to be an individual and a partner at the same time is no easy task for many of us, and this book offers important insights into the process of growth that intimate relationships inevitably force us into. Instead, he believes in our closest partnerships is where it’s most important that we self-soothe, that we stay fully connected to our deepest sense of self, precisely while in communion with someone else.

One person found this helpful. All you have to do is form an emotionally committed relationship and the great Oneness will visit you with all the normal, healthy, difficult problems that bedevil couples who simply want to stay together, love each other, and have decent sex and raise a family. Many voices, one journey.

Passionate Marriage : David Schnarch :

It is quite sexually explicit, though it is done tastefully in my opinion, not for the purpose of arousal like erotica.

I couldn’t get through the first few chapters.

Any intimacy that is passiinate on fear and neediness can never truly fulfill you. The ones who try to keep a stiff upper lip, they are too rigid and they fracture.

At the same time, I also picked up ‘Seven Levels of Intimacy’. Does it leave us feeling understood and appreciated and loved and nurtured? However, this is not a sex “how to” book.